On Being a Stay at Home Mom
04/01/2016
Before Finley was born, Kevin and I decided that I would be a full time stay at home mom. Three months in this and I don't know if I could love it more! I can't believe how lucky and blessed I am to get to raise this little boy of mine(ours haha). There's a lot of times I don't recognize myself like when I sleep until nine in the morning. Sleeping in used to be seven for me so it's like, who am I?
Since my job now is to raise Finley, everything I have/need to do completely revolves around him. If he needs a diaper change and to be nursed at two in the morning, then it's done, I take care of it. Before Fin I would have been miserable having my sleep interrupted this way but now I don't even think twice about it. Of course there are some nights he doesn't immediately go back to sleep when all I can think about is how bad I want to just go to sleep but can't because I have to nurse him again or even just hold him an extra fifteen minutes. When that happens, it's hard to just be ok with being awake in that moment and I desperately wish he would just stop and go to sleep.
It's funny because I used to not do things because I procrastinated doing them. Now, I don't get things done because I have to make choices on what to do. I don't always have time to do everything that needs to be done so I have to choose: do I clean the kitchen or do I do laundry. Do I fold laundry or do I take a shower? Do I get completely dressed or not? (I usually don't but that's ok bc I don't go anywhere). But you know, even though I have to choose one thing to do, I kind of feel like I'm getting more efficient at all of that too. That may just be my imagination running away with me but I'm going to choose to believe it's happening.
On Monday I will be three months into this mamahood gig. I feel like we have a good rhythm so far adjusting to a family of three. I'll never forget that Monday morning where I started labor at 3:00 am and I haven't stopped working since. This is the hardest but best thing I've done yet and I believe it's only going to get better.
Since my job now is to raise Finley, everything I have/need to do completely revolves around him. If he needs a diaper change and to be nursed at two in the morning, then it's done, I take care of it. Before Fin I would have been miserable having my sleep interrupted this way but now I don't even think twice about it. Of course there are some nights he doesn't immediately go back to sleep when all I can think about is how bad I want to just go to sleep but can't because I have to nurse him again or even just hold him an extra fifteen minutes. When that happens, it's hard to just be ok with being awake in that moment and I desperately wish he would just stop and go to sleep.
It's funny because I used to not do things because I procrastinated doing them. Now, I don't get things done because I have to make choices on what to do. I don't always have time to do everything that needs to be done so I have to choose: do I clean the kitchen or do I do laundry. Do I fold laundry or do I take a shower? Do I get completely dressed or not? (I usually don't but that's ok bc I don't go anywhere). But you know, even though I have to choose one thing to do, I kind of feel like I'm getting more efficient at all of that too. That may just be my imagination running away with me but I'm going to choose to believe it's happening.
On Monday I will be three months into this mamahood gig. I feel like we have a good rhythm so far adjusting to a family of three. I'll never forget that Monday morning where I started labor at 3:00 am and I haven't stopped working since. This is the hardest but best thing I've done yet and I believe it's only going to get better.